Three Months After Their Date A Guy Sent This Girl A Horrific “List Of Tips” So She Could “Improve Herself”

Every time I consider trying out one of the many, many dating apps out there, it seems that a truly horrific dating app experience story will crop up, go viral, and put me off of doing it for another 3 years… which is probably for the best.

This latest dating-app horror show involves a 24-year-old woman named Kimberley who is from Morecombe, Lancashire in the UK. 3 months ago, Kimberley took a chance and went on a date with a guy she met on popular dating app Tinder, and due to this monster… I mean guys behavior, I’ll be referring to him as D. H… hopefully you’ll understand where I’m coming from.

Anyway, the two matched on Tinder and text each other for a week before they decided to meet up and go on a date. Nothing out of the ordinary so far, right?

First, they met for a coffee at a Costa (a popular coffee chain in the UK), and Kimberley commented that at this point, it was going “really well”.  Then, from Costa they headed to a pub in the Lake District for some grub… and this, dear readers is where it all started heading south.

You see, this is where D. H. decided it’d be the perfect opportunity to ask dear Kimberley if she would ever consider having plastic surgery… and then went on to suggest places she should probably consider shopping before their next meeting. Um… what?

But he didn’t stop there – oh no. He then rounded the whole thing off by kicking up a giant fuss when Kimberley offered to pay. In fact, he was so distraught by this fairly common act, that he even showed her his bank balance on his phone. What an absolute JERK.

And I know, you’d think at this point it really couldn’t get any worse, but of course, D. H. had a few more “golden” tricks up his snake-like sleeves.

Three months after this absolute disaster of a first date with a man she has now described as ‘a snob and just generally a horrible person’, which I personally think is her being way, way too kind, Kimberley then received a completely unexpected message from you-know-who.

The message began:

“Hello Kimberley, I know we went on a date quite a while ago now but I’d like to explain why I haven’t messaged you.”

How INCREDIBLY thoughtful of him. Bleurrrgh.

It then continued:

“I feel like you could have made the date much better, here’s a few reasons why. I apologize if I offend you.”

D. H. THEN began to reel off 15 (yes, FIFTEEN) pointers, rendering the conditional form of the ‘if’ completely redundant to the whole Nice Guy facade he was obviously trying, and failing miserably, to present.

The completely inappropriate and unasked for message then continued:

“If you lost some weight you would look incredible. Maybe a stone or so.

You are very pale. I know you aren’t a fan of the sun but a bit of fake tan wouldn’t hurt.

You have quite big boobs so you should show off your cleavage more.

I think you need to wear clothes that suit your figure and maybe update your style slightly. Just so I’m not embarrassed to be seen with you.”

The King of the textbook definition of ‘gaslighting’ then added:

“You need to dye your hair a normal color and add extensions. Longer hair is much more attractive.

You need to look more natural, stop wearing makeup. Just make yourself look decent but don’t overkill it.

Your lips have gone down so you should think of getting more filler. I know you said you regretted it but filler would make you sexier.”

Ugh, this is painful. Isn’t there some kind of disaster somewhere I could be writing about instead? He’s not done yet.

BUT WAIT! There’s more! Because of course there is:

“You need so much more confidence, confidence is sexy!

The fact you take things slow makes you look like a prude. I didn’t get a kiss which messed with my ego. Be more sensitive to others’ feelings.

When we got food, I know you got a salad but having full-fat coke is more calories you don’t need.”

The final five points (yep, because he is STILL going) were no better at ALL:

“You need to keep your past to a minimum. I don’t care about it and what you went through.

Get a sense of humor, you didn’t laugh at a single one of my jokes.

You just seemed a bit stuck up. Sort your personality out.

You made me feel shit when you offered to pay. It’s like you thought I didn’t have enough money after telling you how much is in my account.

You didn’t compliment me once.”

I’m sorry but I’m still completely lost as to the point of all this. Does he really feel like he’s helping her? Or is it because his ego is so bruised that she ‘didn’t laugh at his jokes’  he’s just sneakily trying to lash out!?

He (FINALLY) closed:

“If you take these on board I might consider another date. I will give you a month and get back in touch to see if this made a difference. Good day to you Kimberly.”

And just FYI, I didn’t spell the poor girls name wrong there, I’m just quoting how he spelled it. A*shole.

Maybe you’re thinking, come on, this can’t actually be serious, surely? There aren’t men out there that really do this stuff right? Sorry folks, but according to Kimberley and her own encounter with this loser, she interprets these messages as 100% genuine. YIKES.

HOWEVER – and not to excuse any of this behavior in the slightest – Kimberley has also said that there has been a light at the end of this tunnel of crazy.

She has said:

“At first I was absolutely mortified and it killed my confidence, but the more I read it the funnier it became. I couldn’t understand how a guy could say such things to a woman.”

Also, Kimberley’s own date feedback is a lot more measured: ‘My only tip for him is to respect women as his behavior is disgusting.’

And that is putting it SUPER lightly, I’m sure you’ll agree. I just wish she had named and shamed the jerkface! Maybe he’ll come forward to “defend” his actions!? One can only hope!

What do you think folks? Are you as mortified as I am? Have you ever used dating apps before? Have any of your own horror stories to tell? Let me know in the comments! And don’t forget to share this with your friends and family so that they can laugh (and cry) along with us! x

 

 

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